one day when I’m all growed up…

Posted: September 28, 2010 in arb stuff about me, my obscure view of stuffs

Over the last couple of days, a couple of different conversations got me thinking…   What is THE single purchase that would signal to you that you’re all “growed” up, or the one thing you’ve always wanted to purchase but for some or other reason just as you’re about to the funds need to be erm… re-directed to other more pertinant uses?

Don’t get me wrong… I have some nice things – some really VERY nice things… perhaps even the item you’re thinking of!  But golly-gosh-a-molly one purchase eludes me time and time again.  We’ve been in our home for around 8 years or so and just as I’m getting ready to begin the on-line-shopping-voyage-of-discovery that purchase needs to be put on hold.  Strange, hey?

My item is proper PATIO FURNITURE!  You see – Grown-ups HAVE Patio Furniture…

  • Grown-ups don’t sit on the dog’s bed smoking their cigarettes while their furry-friend cocks his head to the side as if to declare “Give me a shout when you’re done with my spot and I’ll haul my a$$ off YOUR couch!” 
  • Grown-ups sit comfortably on their patio furniture whilst sipping chilled Chardonnay and admiring that evening’s sunset!
  • Grown-ups don’t hose down their green “plestic” chairs and attemp to lego-build the 5-piece-stoep-table-set when they invite friends for a braai (the dog’s bed is sadly too small for everyone!)
  • Grown-ups regularly fill their trolleys and stock their cupboards with trail-mix, pimento stuffed olives, biltong sticks, imported nuts and fish-shaped pretzels in the event of the welcome arrival of impromptu guests. They also have various cutsie-divided-platters.  They also buy wine in bottles which look infinitely classier than a box or squeezed out pap-sak.*
  • Grown-ups consequently also always have to have grass which is neatly trimmed.  Knee-length Kikuyu is not considered a landscape feature in the Grown-up’s garden.
  • Aforementioned Grown-ups chit-chat, make small-talk and have lengthy discussions on such things as Unicef, Altruism, recent Wall Street Bull and Bears, the surge of India as a Superpower and using words like inter alia and et al – all the while listening to the laughter and giggles of their kids splashing in the pool, playing lawn cricket  or chasing the puppies around the garden.**


So I’m thinking… MAYBE… on some subliminal level this is my own personal revolt against growing up… because without Patio Furniture I can still maintain “Joovie-Status”!!!  Yup – that’s got to be it… 0r it could be that my kid needs his third set of grommits, I buggered up my tax calculations (again) or the washing machine is actually speaking parsel-tongue and dancing across the laundry-room floor? 

I’m going with the Joovie-thang – wouldn’t you?

*CAN YOU EVEN DO THAT?  Does wine even come like that?  (shock)

**Additional Grown-up benefits to patio furniture include CLEAN FLOORS because said “kids and dogs” are playing outside…

  1. Jackie says:

    My Teeth!
    Even with our so called top cover I just got quoted a 5 FIGURE AUD amount and it cant be delayed for very long. Does it get any more boring and grown up than that.

    *All I want for christmas is 2 new front teeth*

  2. Sandi says:

    Ouchie… and that’s no fun either is it… will they gooi in some Da Vinci Porcelain veneers too? I ask Jamie the other day what colour my teeth are… he innocently reckons YELLOW! Aaaargh… 🙂

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